8ight

You don't understand reality until it's real
You don't understand hurt until you heal
You don't understand time until it's gone
Just like you haven't understood me all along

Face it; this place is displaced with disgraces
And laced with the traces of past warm embraces
I makeshift a main dish to taste it; reminiscent
It's her scent
Explicit
Exquisite
I remember this feeling; I'm used to it
Exotic
Erotic
Ironic that you remain after many attempts to forget
And I can't seem to untie the laces still traced with
Your past warm embraces
Our faces erased from the 3 x 5 frames in
Attempts to displace a past incomplacent
A present incomplete
A future obsolete
Deceit
Defeat
I remember this feeling
Lather, rinse, repeat
I'm quite used to it
No more will I repeat
No more will I retreat
No more will I compete with our faded glory
Rather.....I'll attempt to write a brand new story
Empowered by the life I once had in memory
But positive like the energy that lies within me
Consistently, it's blissfully entangling me in it's web..
I let the pen tell my story
Saddened when I fell, yet still I climb
Still I write
Still I fight
I'm new to this feeling
Live, love, learn
I can get used to this

Se7en

It seems ritualistic
I drink this poison nightly
It pains my insides
Risks my outsides
But somewhere within
Beneath the skin
I derive twisted pleasure
Here's the line
I stand with toes over the edge
Locs grazing my skin
While I'm grazing my end
You think I'm dumb
I just want to be happy
I can't find my home here
Home isn't there anymore
Home is with you
But you're not mine
Despite what you say
You belong to them
Those with a future
Those with a chance
What the FUCK do I have?
A life ready & willing
To drag you down

Yet I still miss you.

6ix

I took too many chances to be unsure of
who it is I want to share with my pure love
Now that I'm cured of the allure of the provocative demure of
the two that endured my very immature love
I believe I'm mature 'nuff to learn how to live in terms of
Being with a single being, that which I fell short of
I never cheated or anything
But this is why I sing my sad song
About the two women that I constantly treated wrong
All along I was holding the hearts of the two
And struck the cue ball that easily broke through
No clue how I accrued such a hideous rep
But the first step's a doozy
So I kept trippin' off the same one. Still stunned. No fun.
I want to make myself, not make something.
The one thing about that is I think romance
Enhances my chances

But I took too many of those already

Even if my finances span expanses, it's too late
I took too many chances
Lust is all that's to experience
Now that I consider life's riddles
I might still be woozy from that first step.
Dizzy, tryna keep my mind busy & crowded on all sides
They both still reside within my clouded mind
My chip-toothed heart, and the depths of my soul
The same mind that sold me their sensual glances
The same heart that made too many advances
The same soul that did too many dances
The same Draa that took too many chances

My fears appear to be drawing near, and yet
This drama can be exploited & avoided easily I bet
I didn't say anything binding, so nothing is set
So I guess I should pay the price before I owe the debt
Consequences mean spiritual fences and I feel that's a threat
To the life I live in freedom-free of love, but also regret
Soon I will forget pain and step out of its silhouette
But a worse decision would be to just do it, like cigarettes
Going out of my mind 'cause I find I'm fined for another
Who used to love me so much, she called me her brother
Lover? No. But it goes to show that a friend
the opposite gender doesn't mean what society screens
into even the minds of the defined teens
The same minds that buy sensual glances
The same hearts that allow excessive advances
The same souls that are taught so many dances
The same people that gave me too many chances.

5ive

Our Father, who art in heaven
Hallowed be thy name
thy kingdom come
thy will be done
On earth as it is...
...in heaven.

The Magnificent One, The Chosen Son,
and Holy Spirit working in unison
to bring us all to an easier state of living
Forever loving, understanding, and giving
However, this fixation our nation has with itself
Crying, lying, and dying over nothing but wealth
I am constantly trying to uplift those younger than me
to understand that this world is not all about money,
cash, hoes, sick flows, crack-dealin' and girl-stealin'.
But TV makes it so appealin', this..."lifestyle".
I get this sinking feelin' that my efforts aren't worthwhile
But I continue. I may, one day, save someone
from a life of negativity and commercialized activity
and, like a needle, inject creativity in their veins
So that they bleed lifelong achievements.
Anatomically speaking, I'm physically seeking the truth
to feign the haters that constrain our youth
daily with no hesitation. So my destination?
Helping younguns understand the reason for education.
I set up my perverbial booth in the hallways and, like a patient
I wait, anxiously, for someone to let me give them the accurate
prognosis of "that" life. If they grow up immaculate
Then I would feel accomplished. I could pack up & get
going to the next place where one such as I am needed
to weed out the bad & deliver the goods to succeed with
But help, I need it. This is definitly not a job for ones self.
Lord, hear my prayer - I've put it in your hands now.
Give me the confidence to take a positive stand now.
Give me the strength so I can KEEP my firm stand now.
And Lord, I know it may not go the way I planned now.
But Jesus, I can better understand now.
I experienced your love firsthand now.
So I'm willing to let you be in command now.
I can't understand how you withstand now
seeing that your grace & mercy is in high demand now.
But you do it. But on the other hand, now,
You got enemies tryin' to bring ya mans down!
I've been keepin' quiet, ain't been pokin' my face around.
But in Satan's world, I'm the talk of the town!
Please watch over my soul, Lord.
That's all I ask you to do for me.
I don't know when I'll be walking in unknown territory
Scary for me, but your grace & glory fortify me.


"Even though I walk through the valley of the shadow of death, I shall fear no evil, for you are with me. Your rod & staff comfort me" - Psalms 23:4

4our

I try to stand upright and walk with my head in the clouds
But I can't commit to that because reality's here on the ground
Problems are like drunk drivers - they don't care who they hit
But they hit you & keep going, and I doubt they'll ever quit
They don't have insurance - just assurance that I'll feel it
So whenever a collision happens, there's no way I can appeal it
I try to handle problems like a deck & deal with it
But I'm human and sometimes I just don't be feelin' it.
And people say all the time that I should 'stand tall'
But whenever they tell me that I feel 6 feet small.
Against the wall is where I stand currently when I clasp my hands
I only pray for the needy, but today I AM that man.
Take a stand & stay on the ground, but DO know this
Doing such doesn't mean that your dreams don't exist
But keep dreams AS DREAMS and stick true to your mission
But also stick to ya guns, and by 'guns' I mean AMBITION
The dreamer keeps on dreaming as the schemer keeps on scheming
Until one day the schemer succeeds and leaves the dreamer steaming
Jealousy, anger, depression all in immediate succession
Are sins that can erupt from the volcano named AGGRESSION
So the lesson for today is just to stay on the ground
And learn your way around when you move to a new town
Those words are deeper than they seem; be careful not to drown
If you always think you're on top of things, the only way is DOWN
I frown upon the behavior of the verbally conceited
Until they are defeated because their ride overheated
Whatever it was that kept their ego going
Is the same thing that keeps my ink flowing
Whatever it was that kept their ignorance showing
Is the same thing that keeps me from life-forgoing
There has to be success in order to balance out the rest
I just want to be ready when God hands out the final test
Blessed be the meek, for they shall inherit the earth
And blessed be the poor, because they understand 'worth'
Blessed be the dead, because they understand 'birth'
And blessed be the weary, because they understand 'mirth'
Blessed be the name of the Lord, I say
Because of His grace, I stand tall ANYWAY
But I know in my heart that at the end of it all
I'll be okay if I just 'stand small'

Tr3s

You're still here
I'm so far-gone, but you're still here
At least that's how things appear
A photograph replaces the physical half
Entwining intimately with infinite memories
My grief, I won't show it
So the half, you won't know it
You never knew my love because I never knew it
Sorry, God. I messed with her mind & now I blew it
Seeing is believing, so when I said 'screw it'
We were both blown away at the fact that I could do it

And I'm still here
She's so far-gone, and I'm still here
I still hear the laughter
The late-night, sweet chit-chatter
But now I hear the pitter-patter of rain
I've been feigned by this pain that I live with
Losin' the heart that your love used to live in
Going loco cuz I long to be forgiven
Feelin' like a hut when I used to be a buildin'
And you were my window to the world.
You WERE my world. The only visible girl.

And now I hear the echoes in the chambers
Into my heart, I shout your name
The voice that shouts back is stranger
than the sound of the original
I'm starting to realize reality
Leaves a lot of hints subliminal
Just to test our originality in handling emotions unwanted
I feel a little naked if my love goes unflaunted
Memories in this house got me haunted
Like a geek gettin' taunted daily
And I bet you thought I was talkin' about Phylli
I said that you wouldn't know the half
Now I got you curious like a kitty
I pity the fool who think they know me as if I'm a statistic
So today I will NOT be food for the minds of the narcissistic
I can handle my love, narc
I don't need you to guide me
Go on about your day, I got Jesus beside me
Prolly think I'mo come back like I need you
But there was a time when I would beseech you to take me back
Like the games you hated, I played 'em
So you took them to Gamestop to trade 'em
Like clippers to hair, you reduced me to nothin'
Until the day I found out that I CAN do somethin'
On my own
Ever since then I've been in some sort of zone
Prone to depression, but me stressin ain't gon' lead me to my blessin'
So the sins I atone for allow me to be shown more
Like I'm lookin' in the mirror at the evils my clone wore
And what my mirror says I'm seeing is the most beautiful being
That anyone could have ever known before
Like that girl in the movies that washed up on shore
And me being young didn't help me any more
back then, but now my 'maturing' is through
We're due to debut what we used to pursue
Our love, but my love please don't misconstrue
My passionate word for being ANYTHING taboo
I believe this time apart made me better for you
And although I wanna undo what I caused you
I think the pain & hurt sorta helped to cause YOU
So occasionally, on nights like this, I pause to
Reflect on the days we'd spend
As the greatest of lovers or the best of friends
I stare at your photos, completely in awe
Because you are a reflection of perfection
In you, I see NO flaw
Come to think about it, I remember your 'shady' spell
The one where you'd love to retreat to your perverbial shell
You thought you were safe & all alone
Until I accidentially heard you singing on the phone

...so lovely...

You bloomed from there & the rest is history
And although 'I' can't stop 'ME' from missing 'WE'
I'm about as comfortable as I'm ever gonna be
If anything happens in the future, we'll see
But for now you'll remain my one...

...my only...

Ms. Teri.

2wo

Sometimes I get in these little moods where
I tend to refuse communication of any sort
Although most abhor the thought of me doing such
I often wonder 'what's the fuss?' and 'why does one need to speak to me?'
Until it discreetly blends in with my spirit
Compressed depression finally expands within me
Completely, I'm overwhelmed by the sensations my defenses are defenseless against
Suprised by this new mood that settled into its new host
I let it be - I let it reign completely
Without mercy it takes over me
locked in my body, longing to fly freely
The black prince that once ruled his perverbial nation
now lies on the brink of self-destruction

But there is this painting. A painting so special to me
A painting so inspiring to the spirit of the dying
charisma that is my persona's natural "charm" as they call it
This painting reminds me of the dreams I dream so frequently
Dreams of creating my own family
Dreams of being more of a daddy than mine had been to me
Dreams of accomplishing what too many black men let go to waste..
..if not put it to waste themself...
This painting is more than fabric in a frame
This painting portrays solidified statementsmeant to inspire those weak and weary soldiers at the stereotypical war
Those same soldiers that wonder what our black men are spiritually dying for
This painting is more than colors on a clean canvas
This painting talks about us black people using our roots to survive
Listen to how we thrive on the "teleradio's" perspective of how we should be
and our "reality" consists of phony hair to look more like someone else's definition of 'pretty'
So I continue to stare at this painting that means more to me than a perfectly posed photo
This painting catches a righteous man fighting the good fight to live right
To carry his family through life's harder roads
To be a stronghold for a strong wife to birth a strong child
All the while giving birth to the new meaning of '..worth a thousand words' to the eyes of the beholder
Right now I hold a couple hundred G's worth of unspoken lyricism
All which fit nice & snug, nesstled in with the rest of em
But yet I still can't even begin to describe what this painting means to me
It's infinitely tryin to tell me to keep going
For one day the results of my input will constantly show and
I will be able to "wake up and dream dreams" daily with no hesitation
amidst a crowd of people that shout aloud the lyrics I support
with bottom-booming basslines and purpose behind my musical mind
And soon enough I will create my own painting to inspire others

There is a painting on a wall in a room within my home
This room I sit in to listen to the painting's solemn song
Inspiration melodically voices its opinion
It tells me to be the support por mi familia

"Don't look down - the stars are up."
It's not like life is a gun & you are the bullet
You don't get one shot to make it there
Rather, think of it as a trampoline
and you're constantly jumping into the air
One day you're going to accomplish SOMETHING
Hopefully you could stand strong
And at least land amongst the clouds
Instead of falling to the wayside of the trampoline you were on

1ne [unfinished]

I'm tired...so so tired...
My body grows weary with every attempt to soar
Whenever I need rest, my companionship is needed more
A text, instant messenGERS, some light conversation
Or a stupid argument in this distant relation.
Bullshit.
Not much longer can I handle it
This trinity of stress - work, school, and band
It seems that my dreams to succeed are at hand, yet
The road to success is truly a rough one
I know school is good, but not if I don't care enough for it
Work should support me, but I'd still rather abort it
This band is so grand to me
My life's biography, composed musically in its entirety
So new to me, it used to be this dream simply REFUSED TO BE...
Well now it's here and it feels funny to live my dream. Literally.
So I have to work on it. I have to put time in
Yet this work and school still wants to win
I feel that the band is my best bet to win this game of life
How do you explain that to your parents?
They won't understand..
Well...really my mom is the one that wouldn't understand
My dad used to play violin and would always tell me, "Man...
if you get good enough with that bass and you make it your career
then work won't be work and you've no need to fear
whether you've lived your life the way you wanted because of what you love
and what you love is what you do and that's all you need, son.
It seems that your dreams resemble what mine used to be.
And it seems that you can play that bass quite beautifully.
And I believe that, through you, my dreams still live within me.
So I'll support you and your cause wholeheartedly."
So through the stratosphere, my spirit soars sporatically
For so long, I've strived to find where I oughta be
And these demons used to always get the best of me
But still I fight to see if it's right to be...
True to me. Personally, everyone that knows me can agree
I'm about as unique as each line in my poetry
I'm about as fun as massive bubblewrap popping
And I'm about spreading the love -- NEVER STOPPING.
So I think it's okay to say that I'm going to continue
Feeding you these words until you sampled the whole menu
iFlow til I die
Cuz my Soul doesn't lie
iFlow Soul through every fingah!
So let it ring in ya ears for the rest of your years!
Let death and despair be the LEAST of your fears!
Let your spirit rain forth -- don't be afraid to show tears!
Let your fight have to right to inspire your peers!
Keep going, fellow artists, because you are on the right path
To a life of cherished memories that will become an awesome past
Ever since I been blessed with the poetic soul Ness
I've been ever-so-confident that I'm blessed with the best
Even when our friendship was put to the test
It was us in the end -- standing taller than the rest
Now we takin' these matters into our own hands
iFlow Soul is the business -- artistic vision in our plans
Whether it be a rhythm, a beat, a vision or a rhyme